He's been sleeping iwht ***
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.