my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
