i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
