I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
