Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
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We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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