god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
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All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
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Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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