You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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