Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
How does it feel to date your dad?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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