i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
