tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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