I hate your face
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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