you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
