I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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