I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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