my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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