Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Randomize
