awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I need to stop coming to work sober
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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