susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
