Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
