I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize