I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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