Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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