Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
