Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
