Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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