i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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