Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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