We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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