i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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