This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I need to stop coming to work sober
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
