that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize