It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Small penises have feelings too.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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