shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
