so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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