I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
