If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
