i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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