Buhtt sex?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
