Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
