Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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