I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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