Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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