What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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