I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize