lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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