Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
The best revenge is premature balding
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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