your room smells of hookers.
And success
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
