Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize