when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
