My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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